Mandir Wahin Banayenge

 

Today is a special day for India, especially for Hinduism. It's a movement that brings everyone together, even if you're not a believer. A while ago, in 1992, there was a similar movement that united Hindus all over the country. I remember it well because I was deeply involved. Back then, I was in 10th grade and an active member of RSS, leading two different shakhas in our area. My study desk and closet were filled with Jai Shree Ram stickers and pictures. LK Advani's rath yatra was so significant and expected to awaken Hindus across India, and received warm welcome in every city. I used to be part of the satellite rallies in Indore, marking my presence and support for the temple. Icons like Murli Manohar Joshi, Ashok Singhal, Vinay Katiyar, Uma Bharti, and Sadhvi Ritumbara were my role models, and I used to listen to their speeches all the time. We had weekly meetings long before the Babri Masjid demolition, planning and organizing logistics for the Karseva. Discussions also revolved around protecting our buildings and colony from a neighboring Muslim settlement and we kept petrol bombs, bricks, etc collected on the top of our terrace ready, in case there was an attack. 

A day arrived when they listed the Swamsevaks for Karseva for our region, and I was at the top of the list. Each day, groups from Indore set off for Ayodhya on trains. Although I had no clue which train to take, but the thought of "Mandir wahin Banayege" fueled my determination. I started preparing, I made sure my parents were unaware, or else they wouldn’t let me go. Packed my stuff and got ready, a jeep at a friend's house took us to the train station filled with Hindus chanting slogans, armed with lathis, swords, and more. Excitement filled the air; we were heading to Ayodhya, me without fully understanding Karseva's purpose.

Back then, I didn't think we were going to demolish the mosque; I believed we were uniting to show strength and add to the Rath Yatra when it reached Ayodhya. There was news of killings and injuries of the Karsevaks who were in Ayodhya, our anger increased our interest further and we were all set. But just before boarding, we learned the train was loaded and could not take any more, and some of us have to wait until the next day. They picked the teens who weren’t adults yet and asked them to stay back and coordinate for the next train, my mentor was 22 years old and was already on the train. Disheartened, I returned home, missing the chance, and wasn’t able to go back the subsequent day. Later, news of the demolition brought joy and we had several celebrations, though I regretted not being there for that historic moment.

Now, 31 years later, disconnected from RSS, I have a very different thought process and ideologies. But when I reflect on the temple news, memories flood back, and I recall all that I witnessed at such a young age, questioning if it's more than just a temple, maybe a way to unite Hindus globally. The absence of past leaders like Advani, Joshi, and Singhal in the limelight saddens me. Despite ideological differences, today marks a significant day, and I feel proud of what we got after several sacrifices and ending a long battle for all Indians.

California Trip Sep 2023

Plan - 7 days trip to California

Details - San Francisco, Yosemite National Park, Lake Tahoe

DAY 0

 So, the day kicked off at a pretty relaxed 11am. We hopped in the car, and after about 1.5 hours on the road from Fremont, we landed right in San Francisco. First things first, we hit up Lombard Street – you know, that super curvy one that's practically an urban roller coaster. It's like the city's way of saying, "Buckle up for some zigzags!"

Then, we moseyed on over to Pier 39 – a total hive of activity. Sea lions, tourists, street performers – you name it, they've got it. By this point, our stomachs were calling the shots, so we stopped by Boudin. Now, those sourdough bowls filled with Clam Chowder and Tomato Basil? Let's just say they hit the spot. Unfortunately, the chicken sandwich didn't quite make the cut, but hey, not every bite can be a winner. Stomachs satisfied, we went for a leisurely stroll along Piers 39 through 45. And whoa, talk about Snack Central! Street vendors were dishing out everything from juicy fruits to cool drinks – and yep, they even had some boozy options for those feeling a little adventurous. Next up, we cruised over the Golden Gate Bridge. Now, here's where things got a bit tricky. The bridge was playing hide and seek with the clouds – seriously, they were like clingy friends just hanging around the bridge. Not much bridge-viewing luck for us. But you know what they say about silver linings? The view from the other side was off-the-charts gorgeous. San Francisco's downtown skyline was strutting its stuff against the backdrop of clear skies. A cloudy bridge might've been a miss, but the city's skyline was definitely a hit.

Once we made it back from the bridge into the heart of San Francisco, we aimed our wheels towards the Palace of Fine Arts. A majestic palace with picturesque architecture and a serene lake backdrop. Cameras went into overdrive as we snapped pics from every angle. Parking? Well, that was a saga in itself. After a bit of a wait, luck finally smiled at us, and we snagged a parking spot. Time was creeping up, and the clock said it was about 6:30pm. Our next move? Ghirardelli Square, baby! We had one mission there: the ice cream extravaganza. Parking up near a dog park, Shanaya got a burst of excitement seeing a doggie playground. Ice cream cravings satisfied, we indulged in a Brownie Sundae that was the definition of awesome. The whole square was decked out in festive vibes, making the experience even sweeter. After soaking up the Square's atmosphere, our stomachs got back into the conversation. Dinner was on the agenda, and we figured why not go for something a bit more familiar – Indian cuisine. We had a spot in mind near Chinatown, but upon arriving, it was like the place got a "Nope, not this one" sign from us. But guess what? Our eyes caught a couple of Chinese restaurants with lines that could rival a roller coaster queue – especially the House of Nanking. The menu looked promising, but the wait was a solid hour, and our schedule wasn't feeling so patient. So, we waved goodbye to that plan and rolled up to a Nepali restaurant that was conveniently close. Dinner was a hit, and with full bellies, we made our way to our hotel for the night. Now, I'll level with you – Merced wasn't exactly the most happening place to shack up, but it was just a pit stop on our journey to Yosemite. So, a night in Merced? No biggie. 

DAY 1

Morning at the hotel brought a not-so-impressive breakfast situation – let's just say our taste buds were left unimpressed. But no biggie, we weren't exactly roaring with hunger anyway. A little nibble here, a sip of coffee there, and by 8:00 AM, we were back on the road, aiming to hit Yosemite by around 11 AM. Now, we had a hunch that traffic might want to tag along for the ride, but surprisingly, the road gods were on our side and the traffic wasn't the villain we expected.

Naturally, pit stops were part of the equation. We did the whole gas station tango, topped up the ice cooler, and cleverly packed Subway sandwiches to make sure our tummies stayed satisfied. And guess what? Our master plan worked like a charm – we rolled into Yosemite right on schedule, no delays, no detours.

So, after rolling up to our hotel, the thought of an early check-in crossed our minds – you know, to score that elusive parking spot and maybe drop our bags. They gave us the whole pre-registration spiel, but keys? Nah, those were only on the menu after 4 PM. Not the ideal news, but hey, they did drop a solid piece of info on us. Our initial grand plan involved hitting the Mist Trail on Day 3, but it turned out this trail was about to take a maintenance siesta. The catch? We could squeeze it in today if we hustled. And guess what? Hustle mode: ON.

With a quick rejig of plans, we ditched the Plan B and headed straight to the hotel. Car parked, essentials gathered, Subway sandwiches devoured, and we were ready to roll. Hopped onto the trusty Green Route bus and hopped off at Stop 16, primed for the Mist Trail. A 30-minute ride filled with fellow adventure-seekers, and man, was the park buzzing.

By the time we hit the trailhead around 12:45 PM, the sun was blazing high. The Mist Trail promised Vernal Falls and Nevada Falls, with the "mist" bit being legit – the water spray from Vernal Falls likes to give hikers a cool refreshment. Now, our original game plan was to play it by ear and see if we could go all the way to Nevada Falls. The numbers? A round trip of 6.9 miles and a steep 2200 ft elevation gain – might be a bit much for Shanaya and Ishaan.

So, up we went, keeping the Merced River in sight and our cameras ready. First milestone? A bridge that gave us a distant view of Vernal Falls. We thought, "No way we're hiking up there," but we figured, let's see how far the trail takes us. Snapping photos along the way, we soaked up the glorious weather and the jaw-dropping scenery. Breaks? Yeah, we had a few – for pictures, of course.

Finally, we made it to the base of Vernal Falls, where the misty waterworks were in full swing. Of course, we couldn't resist getting up close and personal, and yep, that daring move resulted in a wet and wild adventure. Climbing up to the top of Vernal Falls, the valley view from up there was seriously next level. At this point, we were about 3.2 miles into the roundtrip – the point where turning back was an option. The kids were all ready for that choice, but not us adults.

Even though it was already 3:30 PM and the sun was slowly heading west, we had a crazy idea – let's keep going, all the way to Nevada Falls. The challenge? Making it back with enough daylight. We couldn't see Nevada Falls from where we were, but we figured, hey, let's roll the dice and take the chance. Adventure mode: LOCKED.

And now, it was time for the next level of our uphill journey. No more lingering for photos – a few snaps and videos, sure, but the priority was experiencing every step of this climb. Our mission was loud and clear: keep going until we're at the tippy-top. With Nevada Falls in our sights, distant but undeniable, we were faced with a challenge that seemed almost surreal. But quitting? Nah, that wasn't even a fleeting thought.

Neha, she was brimming with confidence. "Let's do it," she said, and honestly, she was the shot of determination we all needed. The reality hit me hard – opportunities like these aren't served on a platter every day. As we ascended, my concern floated towards Neha's heel pain. Regular check-ins were the order of the day, and thankfully, she was hanging in there.

At last, the Mist Trail bid us farewell as we approached its end. Exhausted kids? Check. Spirits unfazed? Absolutely. Reaching the top, we were a mere 0.2 miles away from Nevada Falls, on the John Muir Trail. And this stretch? It was blissfully flat. The sight of Nevada Falls from above was nothing short of breathtaking – like conquering the world. Kids, their grins were like trophies. Moments of quiet reflection punctuated our accomplishment.

Sharing the vista were some hardcore hikers who planned to conquer Half Dome. A little chat with them about their next-day plan sparked a conversation between Neha and me. My friend Praveena had tamed Half Dome, and as we pondered the challenge, we hatched a two-year plan to prepare and tackle it ourselves. Fingers crossed.

But for now, the return was on the agenda. We chose the John Muir Trail – longer but less rocky, and man, was it worth it. The route unfurled stunning valley views, and the change of scenery was a treat for the eyes. Hiking with Shanaya was like discovering a treasure trove of thoughts, tales, and laughter. No gadgets in sight – just us and the great outdoors, our minds wide open.

Getting back wasn't a walk in the park, though. Neha felt the descent was tougher than the ascent, courtesy of her nagging pain. I could see it in her eyes – discomfort, resilience, and an unspoken determination to push on. Sunset was closing in, and time was no longer a casual companion.

We kept a steady pace of around 2.5 miles per hour. Our rhythm carried us back to the trailhead just in time. Exhilarated, fatigued, but oh, what a sense of accomplishment. A bus ride back to the hotel followed, and dinner was sorted at the Basecamp Eatery right there. The menu? A good variety, and the food hit the spot. A satisfying end to a day of conquering heights and pushing limits.

DAY 2

After a marathon of a day, we hit the sheets like we were aiming for Olympic gold in sleep. The thought on our minds? Well, this marked the end of our hiking spree, and we were already plotting for a lighter day ahead. The lodge was a cozy haven, our room (number 4625, FYI) situated just a hop away from the Mountain Room restaurant. Oh, and guess what? There was a balcony too, the kind of surprise that makes you go, "Nice one, universe!"

Morning rolled in, and thanks to the magic of time zones, we sprang up early and ready for action. Day 2 was on the horizon, and we were pumped. Fresh as daisies, we wasted no time getting ready, landing ourselves at the Basecamp Eatery for breakfast. Big pancakes were on the menu, and Ishi couldn't have been happier. With our fuel tanks topped up, we were set for the adventures of the day.

Our game plan? Glacier Point was calling our names, just a 50-minute drive away. But before we tackled that, we had to make a mandatory pit stop at Tunnel View. From there, the whole Yosemite Valley was laid out like a buffet of natural beauty – Half Dome and Bridalveil Falls included. Photo frenzy? Absolutely.


Then, it was off to Washburn Point, another scenic spot that showed off Half Dome alongside Nevada and Vernal Falls. Seeing those waterfalls framed together was like an instant rewind to yesterday's big hike – a friendly reminder of what we'd achieved. And speaking of reminders, Half Dome's towering presence set the bar high for our next hiking goals.

Glacier Point took our breath away – like, literally. The view? Unparalleled. We clicked away, soaking up the grandeur, before we redirected ourselves to Sentinel Dome. Quick lunch in the parking lot, and we embarked on the hike towards the dome. A realization hit us – every upward hike seems like a monster, but they're often friendlier than they appear. Before long, we were at the base of the dome, with some sneaky black lizards around us.

Climbing up looked intimidating at first – slippery surface, no guardrails – but our trusty hiking shoes played their part. Up we went, the fear fizzling away, revealing an awe-inspiring view that included Yosemite Falls, the tallest waterfall in the park. Half Dome played peek-a-boo with the mountains on the other side, almost same hieght as sentinal dome and all seemed right with the world.

Rain arrived like an uninvited guest. Huddling under a tiny tree was our escape plan, and even though we got a little wet, Shanaya declared it "family bonding time." Now, with around 30 minutes shaved off due to the rain, we faced a crucial decision: hike the extra miles to Taft Point or stick with a 2.2-mile roundtrip to Sentinel Dome? Family voting time – except, it's not exactly democratic. We knew Shanaya and Ishaan would opt for the shorter option, so the challenge-loving adults usually tilted the scales toward the more adventurous choice. And this time, that meant moving on to Taft Point.

About a 3-mile trek to Taft Point, and it took us a solid 2 hours. Initially, the view wasn't much to write home about, but the closer we got, the more it hit us – the height of this place was no joke. There was this one spot, just a railing at the edge, and let me tell you, it took some courage to even peek over. We clung to each other like our lives depended on it, stepping carefully, eyes wide open. The view? Valley and Yosemite Falls on display, and boy, I don't think I've ever seen something so steep in my life. That got me thinking – am I generally scared of heights, or is this just a special case?

Back from Taft Point, we had a new goal – a spot about an hour's drive away. Time was ticking, it was nearing 6:15 PM, and Mariposa Grove was calling us with its giant Sequoias. As we pulled in, reality hit – a bus was needed to reach the grove, but the last one had already departed at 7 PM, and it was now 7:30. Major bummer alert. Just when we were about to pack up our dreams of colossal trees, we spotted a glimmer of hope – the bus was returning, dropping off its passengers. We thought, "Hey, let's roll the dice," and after a chat with the driver, he offered us an unconventional solution. We could follow his bus and make our way to the grove.

Excitement level up, we followed the bus and ended up amidst these mammoth Sequoias. They were ancient giants, some scarred by recent wildfires. We learned that Sequoias can grow up to 300 feet tall, span 35 meters wide, and reach the ripe old age of 3000 years. Most of the Sequoias in the park were a "mere" 800-1000 years old. Visiting the grove was a solid experience, but if we're honest, we did question if it justified a 2-hour round trip.

Heading back to the village, dinner beckoned, and Curry Village had our answer – pizza. With the pizza joint closing at 10 PM, it was a no-brainer. Two pizzas, one dining room, and a satisfied crew. Ice cream? Normally a hit with the kids, but after that pizza feast, they were as stuffed as a turkey on Thanksgiving.

Emerging from the dining room, darkness swallowed the parking lot – but the sky? It was a twinkling masterpiece. Stars galore. Shanaya, in her usual inquisitive style, started in with constellation questions, and while I'm no star expert, we whipped out the trusty planet app and spotted a couple of planets hanging out up there. Eventually, it was time to head back to the hotel, tuck ourselves in, and drift into dreamland. A day of adventure and exploration topped off with a side of stargazing wonder.

Irrelevant

Its been a long long time since I wrote here and am wondering, why did I not write. Well yesterday night I suddenly woke up, and while trying to sleep, I came across a thought that made me turn on blogger today and write something. I was thinking about, why we do things that we do. May be asking that question will make us think and do things different. Yesterday I was thinking about being irrelevant, how irrelevant is a person in this world. I felt its very important to be irrelevant because you want to be easily replaceable, and its completely opposite of being famous, critical and know.

I felt, we always expect our kids to do well in life and be known for good things that they do, be famous. We give so much importance to the fact, who was the person, its so important to know who invented something, or who came up with the idea. Why are we interested in knowing the person, and then we would start profiling the person. We should rather be interested in knowing the process that makes such person. A person who did right thing or a great act is not because he was made to do so, its because the process that changed or made the him and his way of thinking, was good. A role model should not be a person but a process that made him.

Just imaging of a world, where we stop talking about a person, giving him credit for things that he is doing, and rather just talk about the things that are been done are right or not. By doing this, I feel we will be able to get rid of the crave that an individual has to become famous and the ego that he would have after he becomes famous. Think about few examples, if the culture and ideas in a business are stronger any normal leader can turn it into success, if policies are stronger, any politician can serve their people, if family values are strong your kids could become a better individual like you. If you as a leader, politician or head of a family are irrelevant and replaceable, your legacy can be successful and followed forever because it comes with strong process, policies and values.

Making God (a person who made the world) irrelevant is very important so that one can appreciate the enormous beauty of vast universe that he created. 

Social Involvement

I believe every idea that can impact a large mass of population is surely worth sharing. We have a group of about 10 Indian families who live like a big family, everyone of us is close to our motherland and think and care about our country. We do so many activities together including adventures, vacations, festival celebrations but for the first time we thought of doing a social activity which could benefit someone in need. The first thought that came to everyone's mind was to donate some money to a non profit charity org, but taking inspiration from innovative minds around the world, we always get attracted to doing something different and new. Hence we thought of a different idea which is not as simple as shelling out some dollars from our pocket and would give us fun and has a mass appeal.

We decided to put a stall in a Indian fair, because food stall was expensive we thought of putting a beverage stall and sell Indian beverages like Mango Lassi, Buttermilk, Jal-jeera etc, water and cold drinks and pass on all our profits to a non profit organizations. We thought by doing this we would be able to spread word about the non profit org to more than 15 thousand people who visit the fair and will be able to enjoy the 2 days fair with our entire group working for a single goal. Moreover we wont have to ask for a donation, all we would do is just sell beverages at regular price and earn profit to donate. In a way we were donating time to earn money.

Everyone liked the idea and when we started working towards it, we got additional helping hands, one of the restaurants donated us unlimited mango Lassi and butter milk, other stores gave us free water bottles and cold drink cans, which saved us the cost and hassle of making these items, almost everything that we bought to sell at the stall was free of cost for us. At the fair we got a tremendous response, there were about 100 other stalls and everyone appreciated the kind of work we were doing, few of food stalls even offered us free food. A lot of people came to our stall inquiring about the non profit org and we were able to publicize it as targeted. We never thought such a simple idea could explode and give us a tremendous response and just by spending 2 days at the fair and properly planning the event we earned enough money, which could take care of 6 kids for 1 full year giving them clean housing, healthy food, clothing and proper education.

Corruption

We have been hearing this word "Corruption" since ages now, and in last 1 yr we have heard it so many times that even my 3 yr old son Ishaan says we should not do corruption and can recognize Anna Hazaare. But most important question is do we understand what is actually meant by the word corruption, its a term which covers a very broad meaning and I think it was never clearly defined by anyone.

Lets take an example, think at the end of every scenario which one is a bribe.

1. A 5 yr old kid gets 2 chocolates everyday for going to school and finishing his homework on time.

2. One day the family has to go out for dinner, so the father asked his kid to finish his homework 1 hr before the usual time, to motivate him he promised the kid for an extra chocolate if he is successful.

3. Another day this kid got a lot of homework, it was unusual but he still had to complete all so father offered an additional chocolate to motivate him to complete everything on time.

4. Soon getting more than usual homework became a daily routine and father had to give an additional chocolate to finish the work everyday.

5. One day when kid got usual homework but he was feeling very lazy to complete it on time, father decide to offer him an additional chocolate to motivate him to finish it on time.

6. One day when kid got usual homework but did not complete it on time, still father gave him his regular 2 chocolates.

7. One day when kid got usual homework, he did all his work on time but most of his answers were incorrect, still he got 2 chocolates from his father.

8. One day when kid got usual homework, he asked one of his friend to complete his work and offered him 1 chocolate out of the 2 that he will receive from his father to complete it on time.

9. One day the kid did not go to school, did not complete homework still got 2 chocolates from his father.

10. One day his father asked him to do an additional work that was not a part of his homework and not to worry about the homework and still get an additional chocolate.

We might have faced each of this situation or could think about a real life example for each of these. Few of these scenarios dont fall into the category of corruption, they are similar to salaries or rewards that a person gets for doing his job on time, few others are legally correct but ethically/morally wrong, whereas other few scenarios are both unethical and illegal. But every person will have a different opinion and everyone would draw this line at a different place. Few of us would feel comfortble doing unethical things which are at least legally correct whereas others would even consider doing illegal things for personal benefits if the law is not too strict. But the most important thing is to know and think what exactly we are doing and to keep ourselves aware. Think about these points and the category they fall into, next time when you come accross a real life scenario where you dont know if whatever you are doing is corruption or not.

Camping

June 20, 2011

Camping is always one of my favorite activity, and everyone in our group is always ready and excited about it. There is so much enthusiasm that we literally have to limit the number of people we can take for camping, still the number goes up every year. The best part is every year we get to meet few new people and make new friends.

This year the number of campers was 16 + kids, and it was much more fun because everyone in group was experienced and brought in new ideas based on their previous experience. As usual when we started planning, it looked like we would surely run short of time and there would be so much to do and eat during the camping and that is what exactly happened. 2 days was not enough, and this being a new campground, it had strict rules about the quiet hours after 10pm which was very disappointing for everyone in the group. Overall we were able to do what we planned for like hiking, cricket (although we missed our bating and Neha got injured too), sand volleyball, cooking dal bati, grill chicken, paneer, mushroom, play games, dance etc etc in these 2 days and had a lot of fun.

Photography Lessons !!

Its been about 3 yrs since am planning to buy SLR camera and every time I think about it, I think about all the hassles that go with SLR camera. One needs to be really into photography to make optimal use of a good machine. With these thoughts I gave up on SLR and bought Sony H50 2 yrs back, which was an excellent camera and I was proud of my decision of not buying a bulky camera and still getting the zoom and quality I was looking for.

But last year I had an issue with my Sony H50 and slowly it started giving problems and finally few months back the lens on the Camera was totally stuck, which could not be repaired. Now I was back with same old question, what should I buy SLR or Point and Shoot Phew ... It took me more than 3 mnths to research and come up with final decision of buying D3100 from Nikon with 18-55m and 55-300mm lens and I think I would still need one more lens in future.

When I started reading about how to take good pictures and use your SLR for best shots, I found there is whole new area to explore, I never thought about so many things before taking a picture, and am not talking about the technical details of the camera, but about our psychology on what to capture . A picture that you take should speak a lot, it should tell you the whole story about the place where it was taken, in fact you can hide or reveal as much as you want on a picture. It requires a totally different set of eyes and thinking to take a good picture, you need to think like a viewer of the picture and understand what he needs to see and what you need to show him. I thought pictures are 2 dimensional but now I know they are 4 dimensional, you can capture, X and Y axis but could also capture the depth and cover Z axis. But above all that the 4th dimension is the time, you should focus the right dimensions at the right time to have a perfect image.

I think learning photography would require a lot of patience and hard work, you might end up spending 15 mins to take a picture that a viewer would view only for 5 secs. So there is no ROI, its only the satisfaction that you would get after taking a good picture, and believe me not everyone would be able to appreciate the efforts involved. Now when I started reading about taking a better picture, I try to see the pictures with those set of details and its really interesting to notice the minute details that most of us always miss.

Fortunately I have 2-3 of my friends who are guru in this skills and are helping me to understand it better. So let me try few shots and I will keep uploading my best pictures online for comments.

Happy Journey Chachu !!

3 weeks back Dinu came to our place, he took a long vacation to stay with us before he goes back to India. Ishaan was very excited about his visit and was eagerly waiting to see him. During his stay Ishaan was happy because he got a person who can spend a lot of time with him, listen to his stories, answer his questions, do whatever he said and was not strict about eating, sleeping and silly things like discipline and manners. He tried and got almost everything that he planned for his Chachu like carnival, chucky cheese, Museum etc and got to play on Chachu's laptop, iPhone for as long as he wished, without worrying about what will daddy say.

When Dinu left for Airport today, Ishaan was all set to go with him to India leaving me and Neha. On our way to airport Ishaan kept asking and confirming if he is going to India or not, whenever I told him "Ishaan Chachu is going to India" his immidiate question was "How abt me ? I want to go with Chachu". We kept explaining him that he needs to stay back with Mumma and Daddy as they love him and can take care of him, but he hardly payed any attention to such logical explanations. He didn't even care about his favorite toys and his best friends which we told him wont be there in India. At last we reached airport and when Dinu got off the car and was taking his luggage, Ishaan asked him "Chachu, go get the tickets for me too"

We were laughing every time he said "I want to go with Chachu to India, he will take care of me" and if we tell him "Chachu is going to India to get married", his answer would be "I want to get married too", he was very serious about what he was saying and it was so innocent. Although we were a bit surprised by his act but were also happy that he developed such a bonding with Dinu that he has no problem going to India with his Chachu leaving his mumma and daddy. Being in US, we are always concerned about the bonding that Ishaan will develop with other family members and relatives. We keep reminding him of all our family members and keep talking about them, showing him pictures, even if he hasn't ever seen them. His memories with Chachu will always remain in several videos and pictures that Dinu took during his stay and in the end Ishaan did promise Dinu that he will come to India for his marriage and will dance with mumma on "Zubbi Zubbi" song. Finally Ishaan gave 3 rounds of hugs and kisses to Dinu before he boarded for the flight and said "Happy Journey Chachu"

Social Networking

Created on: December 9th, 2010
Posted on: December 9th, 2010

Time is running fast, I still remember about 15 yrs back when I traveled 25 Kms. just to see a computer bought by my friend, who got it from Russia, that was my first personal computer.

One of the most important thing that has changed in these years and specifically in last 5 years is how we interact and network socially. We were always taught how to meet and greet friends and relatives, how to interact with strangers, how to behave in a group, in a class, in a team, but we were never taught how to behave in a virtual environment. When you don't actually see and cannot read his facial expressions and voice modulations, its very tough to interpret and get the actual meaning from just words and also understand the hidden emotions and intentions in those words. With all these limitations of communication, tools like Facebook, linkedin and Orkut for social networking add additional complexity to effective communication. I think social networking, dos and don'ts is a very important topic to be taught at school for kids and teenagers. In this writeup, am trying to list Top 5 dos and donts for social networking websites like Facebook, if everyone of us can be slightly careful about these points we could surely use these tools for our best and prevent the cons attached with them.

1. Profile : All the fields on Facebook profile are not mandatory, try sharing minimum information, specially information like Date of Birth, address and phone number should be shared very carefully. For eg. you can avoid displaying year of birth by changing settings. You could also modify settings to hide specific information from strangers and share it only with your connections. Each word that you enter on your profile carries a meaning and talks about your character, your views and what kind of person you are, for a stranger that is the only source to understand you and make an opinion about you.

2. Photos: Facebook has made sharing pictures very simple and it helps in sharing your special moments with your friends and family, but hold on .. are you sure only your friends and family are the ones looking at those pictures. Change your profile settings to make sure that only your connections view them and not the strangers.
Picture speaks a thousand words, each picture you upload speak a lot about you, your life and what kind of person you are. Every picture you take is not meant to be shared on Facebook to everyone who is on your network. Few pictures are personal and are only for close friends and family members, those could be shared by other means like web albums (for eg picasa), emails etc.
Mobile uploads with distorted and blurred images makes your album less interesting for your connections, try avoiding them.
A comment on a picture is always useful for the viewer, not everyone in your connection could correctly identify Statue of Liberty, if you got a picture under it, comments would help them.

3. Status update: Its a very important piece, do you understand every update that you make on your account like uploading pictures, setting a status, updating profiles goes as a notification to all your connection. Each message you type in your status update would help others to make an opinion about you. Imagine you making fun of your boss/employer and your boss is on your connections. You need to be very careful using the status update if you feel uncomfortable sharing your opinion about a topic with each member of the group use private message instead.

I think a person always behaves differently in different groups, and there are very few topics which are generic that he could share with all groups, he should be careful in selecting those topics.
Also its very dangerous to show your negative emotions on status update, everyone under your connections might not understand them and might create an opinion about you or make fun of your updates. eg. Status update should not talk about your breakup with your girlfriend unless its meant to show your availability to other girls in your connections.

4. Wall post: When you post on a friend's wall, it could be seen by all his connections. Never post a humiliating statements that could make him uncomfortable within his group.
You might be very good friends but wall post is not the right place to make fun of him or share his personal information or details.
Wall post is also not a right place to share contact information, address, account numbers and discuss important information. You can use private messages instead.

5. Photo tagging: Its used to tag your friends in the pictures you have. If you tag a friend in a picture under your account, it would be visible to all his connections. Do not tag a personal picture of your friend which could make him uncomfortable within his group. Try taking his permission if you want to tag him or leave him an email or message when you tag him so that if he is not comfortable he could un-tag himself from the picture.